


Coffee Boy

by Grymmeoir



Category: South Park
Genre: Awesome sibling club, I really want to drink coffee now, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-12
Updated: 2015-02-12
Packaged: 2018-03-12 01:39:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3339131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grymmeoir/pseuds/Grymmeoir
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Craig and his little sister never really got along very much...that is until one fateful day, she asked him to come with her to a certain coffee shop.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Coffee Boy

**Author's Note:**

> Oh hi, this fanfiction was originally posted on October 7, 2014 that includes the note written below:
> 
> It's been quite a while since I've wrote any fanfics... and this is kind of a warm up so don't expect it be mistake-free there's bound to be grammar mistakes somewhere, Anyway hey guys this is a Creek fanfic with some Craig/his little sister sibling love. It also has some mentions of a few slash pairings at the very end. Also this fic was based on David Levithan's short story "Starbucks Boy from his book "How they Met" which is basically a collection of lgbt and straight love stories(Which I recommend you guys read!) Although it has lots of similarities It is not exactly the same as there are many differences between the fic and the story but reading this fic would be much more enjoyable if you know the story.
> 
> With all that said and done...Please enjoy reading.

My little sister and I never really got along much.  
  
Although we grew up in the same environment and had shared the same set of parents we never got close and we barely even conversed. We don't even have that love-hate relationship most siblings have were they would have fights then make up in the end, We sometimes have those sibling rivalry fights sure, but it doesn't end up in heartwarming hugs and making up…Often we would just apologize to each other with blank faces and a mutual understanding that if we don't bury the hatchet Mom and Dad will definitely kick us out.  
  
I don't particularly feel anything towards Ruby, It's like I acknowledge her existence as my younger sister but that's it…nothing more. We never had that bond that siblings have, and I've never really cared enough to establish it with her, yes that's rather cold-hearted of me to not care about my own sister…but looking at Ruby it seems like she thinks the same.  
  
She never really talked to me about anything, or told me about her day. She doesn't even ask for homework help or ask me to pick her up from school…I've always assumed that she does so because she wanted to be independent but it could also be for a completely different reason, Who knows maybe she actually does like me but is just really shy at expressing herself, or she hates me with fervent passion that the mere sight of my face makes her vomit, or that maybe she really doesn't care. I don't know, her thoughts are a mystery to me, like an enigma not meant to be interpret.  
  
That is until summer break eventually came, and something happened that changed my view towards Ruby forever.  
  
And no it's not incest...you creepy fuck.  
  
  
  
* * *  
  
  
  
South Park wasn't particularly known for hot summers but today was different, it was borderline tropical in temperature, and the air felt very humid. The white powdery snow that covered the town almost all year round had melted off and created shallow puddles of which young children mindlessly played and splashed on, the jackets and parkas that most of the locals wore were shed off and replaced with short sleeves and airy shirts and shorts.  
  
I was no exception; I had happily traded off my thick dark blue jacket for a simple blue t-shirt, I also didn't bother to wear my trademark chullo today because there is no fucking way that I am wearing that in the heat.  
  
Currently I am sat on sofa with Ruby beside me, I am stuck babysitting her for the whole summer since our parents went out on a "Mom and Dad only private summer trip"…honestly I wouldn't have come if they asked me to come, who wants to see their parents get all lovey-dovey and shit…I bet they're going to have sex, wait ugh no that's a horrible mental image. And they're going to Peru for fucks sake and like hell am I going there again.  
  
"Craig."  
  
My thoughts were interrupted by Ruby she had apparently said my name, does she need anything? I turned my head to her and she had this blank face on which kind of reminded me of my own. Anyway it's weird that she called me out, she never does that…not unless it's absolutely necessary, I don't even remember the last time we've talked this month.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Come with me." She answered, her emotion not changing.  
  
"Where?"  
  
"Just come with me, I want to go somewhere and when I want to go somewhere you're supposed to follow because mom said that I can't be alone, you're supposed to babysit me right?" Ruby stood up and pulled my arm, attempting but failing to get me off the couch.  
  
"It's like 30C° out there. No way am I going outside…you can go out on your own."  
  
"But I am not supposed to be alone; I am going to tell Mom and Dad!" Ruby threatened, she normally doesn't follow our parent's rules it's weird to see her like this…like she actually wants me to go with her somewhere.  
  
"See if I give a fuck." Okay that might be a bit harsh, but there is just no fucking way that I am going out…  
  
"Wow, Craig you're a fucking douche." Ruby said.  
  
"I get called worse…" I shrugged.  
  
"Well whatever, I am going out on my own…" Ruby sighed then showed me her middle finger; she then climbed upstairs fetching what seems to be an atrociously pink sling bag that had pictures of stars and ponies on it.  
  
Am I really going to let my little sister go out all alone? I mean South Park isn't that dangerous of a place but a whole lot of weird shit does happen there…Ah fuck it.  
  
"I changed my mind; I am coming with you…"  
  
Ruby raised her eyebrow at me; she then nodded and went outside with me slowly trailing behind.  
  
Outside was worse than I imagined, the sun was actually blistering and the sun rays beamed toward my face obscuring my vision. I made a makeshift sun visor out of my hands while I watch Ruby take something from her pink bag.  
  
She was smarter than I thought; she took out a tiny purple parasol from her bag and asked me to hold it for the both of us, it was a bit embarrassing to be holding such a thing but at least it gave us enough and protection from the sun.  
  
We then continued to walk, I just followed Ruby and had no clear idea of where she plans to go…It felt like we we're going around in circles, but I didn't feel like complaining for the fear that she might take the parasol away from me, which was by the way the only thing that makes walking outside bearable for me.  
  
Eventually we reached our supposed destination; it was the Tweak Bros Coffee shop. Do eight year olds like to drink coffee nowadays? Back then the only kid I know who liked to drink coffee was Tweek and speaking of the devil he was the one in charge up the register, he was wearing an apron and had a few hairclips on which somehow tamed his wild blonde fringe…I haven't really seen him in a while and we also haven't been hanging out these days, Last time I hung out with him was five years ago when he was still a whole lot twitchy and fidgety; he had been more or less calmer and less spazzy these days or so the others say I haven't really had the chance to talk to him yet so I can't say for sure if it's true… Anyway I followed Ruby inside, and stood next to her as we fall in line.  
  
"Why are you getting coffee on such a freaking hot day, Are you insane?"  
  
"I am not getting hot coffee obviously, geez Craig, use your head sometimes…"  
  
I just shrugged and kept quiet while we waited for our turn; I looked around the shop and it had quite a huge amount of customers in, if I remember Tweak Bros coffee isn't really the best and with the weather; a huge amount of customers is very unlikely. But for some reason the place is crowded…the heat must have gone to the people's heads.  
  
"W-Welcome to Tweak Bros. Home of the finest coffee and metaphors, what can I get you?"  
  
When we finally got to the front of the line we were greeted by Tweek who had this big warm smile on his face, this dazzled me for a while as I always knew Tweek as this spazzy, gnome-phobic boy who always had a panicked look on his face…he looked rather adorable when he's smiling I have to admit. I guess this confirmed the rumor that Tweek had indeed relaxed, and is less twitchy nowadays.  
  
"I want an iced mocha without the coffee, extra sugar." Ruby said confidently.  
  
"B-but wouldn't that just be iced chocolate?" Tweek asked confused, I won't blame him… the shit Ruby said is really dumb…but then again she is still just a kid.  
  
"No, I want an iced mocha without the coffee, with extra sugar." Ruby pushed.  
  
"Uhh -nng- o-okay…" Tweek agreed, poor guy.  
  
"What about you asshole, what do you want? Don't worry it's my treat…" Ruby offered. Which I might say is awfully generous of her, for a minute I was tempted to order the most expensive item on the menu.  
  
"Hmm, I guess I want an ice mocha too…with coffee." I answered.  
  
"C-Craig is that you?" Tweek spoke up as he turned his gaze to me. Did he not recognize my handsome face or was he just not paying attention?  
  
"Yeah it's me, what you just noticed?"  
  
"Yeah…I j-just didn't recognize y-you without the -nng- hat."  
  
Hmm? I touched the top of my head and remembered that I left it at home. "Are you saying that I am unrecognizable without my hat?"  
  
"N-NO! I uh just think that you're not Craig without the hat, but don't worry you look okay without it too I guess."  
  
I raised an eyebrow at Tweek who had become increasingly flustered. "I look okay?"  
  
"Huh?" He stared at me wide eyed, confusion written all over his face.  
  
"I just look okay? You don't think I look handsome or cute?"  
  
"Wh-what I-I…" Tweek continued to get flustered his cheeks were now sporting a slight shade of red.  
  
"Oh for fuck's sake…" Ruby mumbled audibly  
  
"I-I am going to make your drinks now…" Tweek hastily left the counter, leaving Ruby and I alone…well not really as there is an increasingly long queue forming behind us.  
  
"Craig, your flirting sucks…"  
  
"What the hell are you talking about?"  
  
"But then again…It was effective nonetheless."  
  
Believe me I had no idea what the girl was talking about, I don't think I remember flirting with anyone with her near, also I am sure as hell that I've never actually flirted with anyone in my life. So what the hell was she on about?  
  
Tweek eventually arrived holding two cups of iced mocha, or rather a cup of iced mocha and iced chocolate.  
  
We took the drinks and sat down on table beside the window, Ruby silently sipped on her drink with a seemingly irritated look on her face.  
  
I ignored her and sipped on my own drink, It was surprisingly good...I guess Tweek Bros. had improved its quality over the years, I then eyed Tweek who was now back to his normal working demeanor, I must admit that I got a bit of entertainment from teasing him earlier, I missed the guy…He's really fucking weird, but in a good way.  
  
After a few minutes or so Ruby told me that we should return home, I was feeling rather comfortable with my seat so I was a bit reluctant to go but fuck it there's no use arguing with her anyway.  
  
Back home Ruby and I didn't talk to each other again, and I didn't mind since that's how it was always been, although there are a few differences as she now snuck glances at me when I thought I wasn't looking. I disregarded her suspicious behavior thinking that it didn't mean anything.  
  
  
  
* * *  
  
  
  
The following day Ruby told me to come with her again to Tweek Bros. and I did so to without complaining this time, I had to admit that I somewhat enjoyed my experience yesterday and I also got to see Tweek again which is nice.  
  
Ruby once again ordered her iced mocha (chocolate) and I opted for an iced caramel macchiato albeit I had to pay for my drink this time; which I really didn't mind to be honest.  
  
Mr. Tweek was the one in charge of the register this time and I found myself disappointed since I was looking forward to speaking with Tweek for some reason.  
  
We sat on the same window seat we had yesterday, but instead of Ruby silently sipping her drink she ignored, and then she actually started talking to me.  
  
"You seem sad."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Is it because the twitchy blonde isn't here?"  
  
"Who the hell are you talking about?"  
  
"You know the guy at the register yesterday…you know him right?"  
  
"Tweek?"  
  
Instead of answering Ruby just smiled, which I have to admit is fucking freaking me out, she rarely smiles and has never smiled at me…not even when she were a baby.  
  
"Did you just smile? Oh shit the apocalypse is neigh."  
  
"Oh shut up asshole." Ruby finally took her untouched iced chocolate and took a sip, I too did the same with my drink…but for some reason I didn't enjoy the drink as much because something tasted off, It actually tasted okay but isn't really anything remarkable, but at least it was cold and it somewhat cooled me of…I kind of figured that their iced caramel macchiato isn't good.  
  
Eventually we soon left the store again and just like yesterday we stopped talking to each other when we reached our house, Ruby still continued to sneak glances at me which I again ignored even if it freaked me out.  
  
The next day Ruby once again told me to go with her to Tweek Bros. When we arrived however Tweek wasn't there again…Mr. Tweek had been manning up the register again, and I found myself once again disappointed.  
  
I ordered the ice mocha again, since it tasted delicious the other day not like the iced caramel macchiato which tasted like meh, Ruby ordered her iced chocolate too this gained her a very strange look from Mr. Tweek but he was nice enough to oblige.  
  
Sitting once again in our window seat I comfortably sat down on the mini couch and took a sip of my iced mocha…which I must say tasted pretty bland and totally unlike the iced mocha I tasted before, I asked ruby if her iced mocha(or rather chocolate) tasted different…and she told me that it tasted the same as before.; Weird.  
  
"Craig…" Ruby spoke up, again staring at me with a blank face.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Do you have a boyfriend?"  
  
I almost spat my drink due to what she had said, what the actual fuck?! Did my little sister just think I was gay? I am pretty sure that I've never been attracted to any girl before but also never with a guy. So how the hell did she came to that conclusion?  
  
"Ruby…You do realize that I am not gay right?"  
  
"You aren't?" She said this with an incredulous face, which rather offended me.  
  
"No…If anything I am asexual."  
  
"Oh so that's it…"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
An awkward silence soon followed, Ruby and I didn't talk to each other again after that…not until the next day, were she offered to once again go with her to Tweek Bros.  
  
  
  
* * *  
  
  
  
For the past few days Ruby and I had been going to Tweek Bros. It was like a routine that I had grown quite used to, First Ruby's going to go up to her room to fetch her sling bag then she'll tell me to go with her outside and then she'll fetch her parasol from her bag so we had protection from the sun... after a short walk, we'll arrive at Tweek Bros. and I'll immediately direct my attention to who was manning the register…it's usually Mr. Tweek or Mrs. Tweek but every damn day I am hoping it's Tweek, and when Tweek does man the counter…I get this weird feeling in my chest and I am overall happier and then we'll talk about random stuff and I'll tease him or so, I really missed that fucking spaz. Ruby will then order her iced moch-err chocolate and I'll usually have an iced mocha or just water…I find that their iced mocha has an inconsistent taste as one day it'll taste delicious and sometimes it's bland as fuck, anyway…next we'll sit by the window seat the fourth one from the left of the counter…It's really comfy.  
  
So yes that weird cycle repeated day after day, I had no idea why Ruby had been consistently asking me to go with her to Tweek Bros. or how she got her money to buy a three dollar drink everyday but to be honest I didn't care because I was actually enjoying my time with her…Even if we don't talk or do stuff that much I feel like we have an actual bond now, and I seriously think that I am actually getting closer to her.  
  
The next time we went to Tweek Bros. Tweek wasn't there…this continued on for four days then a week, and I found myself not disappointed but rather depressed…I decided to ask Ruby for advice, I know this is very uncharacteristic of me but she's the only one I could talk to at the time.  
  
"Sounds like you're inlove with him."  
  
"I am not…didn't I already tell you I am asexual?"  
  
"You did."  
  
"Then why do you keep saying that I love Tweek?"  
  
Ruby just shrugged and invested her attention back to the book she was reading; I still don't understand her that much. I just sighed and distracted my thoughts by playing video games.  
  
Friday came and I was still feeling pretty down, I didn't left my bed all day, I was wallowing in sadness and really didn't understand why, Ruby wasn't really much of a help…Token and Clyde are away for the summer and it's not like I could to talk to them about this. Ugh fuck I am a mess.  
  
A knock came from the door, and then afterwards it cracked open with Ruby's head popping from behind, I could have sworn I locked that thing…Ruby entered my room she had her bag slung on her shoulders, and she sported a worried look on her face.  
  
"Are you going with me?"  
  
"To Tweek Bros.?" She nodded, her lips formed a pout but it was very slight.  
  
"Nope."  
  
"I'll treat you…"  
  
"No thanks…"  
  
"Oh come on, what the hell are you doing wallowing in your room? This isn't like you Craig, I know you're a pussy but I didn't think that you were this pathetic."  
  
Her words hit me hard, what the fuck am I doing? I am Craig Tucker the most uncaring guy in the planet, since when have I given a fuck to what I feel? All these mixed feelings are just a bunch of bullcrap…I should just ignore it.  
  
I sighed then slowly stood up from my bed, I was going to entertain my little sister's desire to go to Tweek Bros., not only that I am also going to confirm something when I got there…all these feelings will have to end.  
  
After having a quick shower and brushing my teeth, I soon felt that I was ready enough to go outside and face my fears…Ruby just gave me another blank look then shrugged but I could have sworn I saw a glimpse of a smile as she turned her head away from me.  
  
We eventually reached the place and this time as we entered the shop I saw a wild tuft of golden hair, and my heart skipped a beat…as fucking gay as that sounds, I had to say that seeing Tweek again gave me butterflies in my stomach…oh so gay butterflies in my stomach, so gay that it reminded me of Butters, I had gay Butters-flies in my stomach…okay wait screw that, that's just dumb as fuck.  
  
"Welcome to Tweek Br-CRAIG! It's y-you again."  
  
"Yup."  
  
"He missed you." Ruby said with a deadpan voice. Tweek and I both looked at her with confusion, for fucks sake that girl spouts out the weirdest nonsense.  
  
"I uh what do you mean?"  
  
"Ignore her, anyway I've been meaning to ask you something…Do you change your recipe for your iced mocha everyday because sometimes it tastes good and sometimes terrible..."  
  
"Huh? No we didn't It has always been the same…ever since I was young."  
  
"Is that so? Anyway what do you recommend here that's good?"  
  
"Oh well uh the iced caramel macchiato has been a best-seller this summer, so I guess the people thinks it's d-delicious…"  
  
"Hell no…that's stuff is bland as fuck."  
  
"I uh- I was only making a suggestion…" There was a little bit of hurt in Tweek's voice which kind of made me feel guilty, and his eyes were getting a little watery too…which further increased my guilt factor.  
  
"Fuck…okay fine I'll have the iced caramel macchiato and she'll have her iced choc-I mean Iced Mocha without coffee, extra sugar…Is that right?" I turned to Ruby and she just nodded, her attention seems to be focused on something else as she appears to be in deep thought.  
  
While we waited for our drink I stared at Tweek, I felt my depression melt away and I felt instantly better, My earlier thoughts seemed ridiculous now, why was I confused anyway? For a split second Tweek had caught me looking at him and we locked eyes and I could have sworn that my stomach did a the little flippy thing that girls on romance movies have…fuck this is so gay no no no ERASE THAT SHIT CRAIG…THINK OF OUR OTHER THINGS.  
  
Tweek arrived with our drinks and I tried my best to keep calm and avoid his gaze…I quickly grabbed the tray and went towards our usual table but unfortunately someone was sitting on it today so we had to opt for the table beside it, It was still a window seat sure but I am a bit sad that I didn't get to sit on my usual chair as I have already grown attached to it…I even took the liberty if naming it Couchey.  
  
I took a sip of the iced caramel macchiato and goddamn it was fucking good…like it was very pure nectar dined upon by the Gods, my taste buds screamed with happiness every time I took a sip. Halfway through sipping the heavenly drink and I am pretty sure I can orgasm just by drinking it, Ruby stood up and whispered in my ear...  
  
"I heard that Tweek's asexual too…"  
  
"I see…and you're telling me this why?"  
  
"He's asexual, you're asexual…I figured that you two could hook up."  
  
"Are you still on about that? Ruby…it doesn't work that way."  
  
"What do you mean? Straight people fall in love with straight people and homos fall in love with homos…so why can't it be that asexual can't fall in love with another asexual?  
  
"Because being asexual means that you're not attracted to anyone…seriously Ruby I didn't know that you're that dumb."  
  
"Then why is it that you look at him different? Why is it that you look so sad whenever he's not here? Why is it that you flirt with him? And that you unconsciously smile whenever he's around?"  
  
"I don't do that that shit…Ruby."  
  
"You do!"  
  
"No I don't..."  
  
"Stop denying it!"  
  
"Shut up, Ruby..."  
  
Ruby looked at me angrily, her brows furrowed and her cheeks puffy; first she assumes that I am gay then she wants me to hook up with Tweek, What the hell is going on with her?  
  
When we got home that day she didn't speak or snuck glances at me anymore…she ignored my very existence even more than before…when I try to talk to her she doesn't respond and when I try to get near her she'll pretend I am not there…our relationship was actually worst than before.  
  
I tried to honestly think through on why she had been so upset? I mean she was forcing me on someone I don't like…I was in the right and she was in the wrong.  
  
I honestly couldn't imagine myself with Tweek ever, sure he's adorable when he smiles and when he fusses and fidgets whenever I tease him, and that I overall enjoy his company…and that he's really cool, he's also really funny in a weird but awesome way, and how he's really loyal to his friends, how he still secretly believes that underwear gnomes exists but thinks they're on the down low because no one had stolen his underwear for years, and I sure I adore the way he adorably drinks and laps up coffee like a thirsty puppy after a walk, how he has this totally different manner when he's working, and how he has that cute little blush whenever he sees my without my hat on…I really cannot imagine him and I being a couple even if he gives me the whole lot of butterflies in my stomach thing, quickened pulse, and weird overall mushy feeling...I don't think I'll be able to…OH FUCK IT WHO AM I KIDDING? I do like him…maybe even love and Ruby knew it, she knew it all along that I am going to fall for him, she took me every day to Tweek Bros. because she knows that I'll eventually fall for him.  
  
I was a complete idiot for denying everything Ruby had said when it is in fact the truth all along and now I've hurt her feelings when she was actually trying to help me.  
  
Fuck I am the absolute worst brother ever…I feel like flipping myself the bird now. But no that isn't what I should do…I need to set things straight.  
  
I ran upstairs and knocked on Ruby's room, which was locked…She of course wouldn't open it for me, so I decided to tell her everything through the door.  
  
"Ruby you're right…You're so fucking right about everything that I want to say that you're the greatest sister that a guy like me could ever have and that I am sorry for being such an asshole ,Douchebag ,fuckface ,scumbag, and any other offensive insult known to man... to you. I don't know if you're hearing this or if you're sleeping and everything I just said was for naught but fucking hell I want to set things right…I do like Tweek and as of right now I am going to fucking run to Tweek Bros. and confess to him…I realized my feelings for him because of you, and if this relationship works out then I am so going to buy you that large useless bear you wanted. I swear that on stripe's grave…oh fuck I have to go now, I am pretty sure Tweek's shift ends in ten minutes and I really have to tell him as soon as possible. Well…wish me luck."  
  
"PS: You're the best sister ever, oh wait I already that didn't I?...anyway you are."  
  
I ran down then went outside, adrenaline rushing though me as my heart pumped with excitement and fear, I have no idea if Ruby heard everything I said or if she's ever going to forgive me, but I have to focus on one thing right now and that's confessing to Tweek, Out of the corner of my eye I saw him walking from Tweek Bros. I had no fucking idea where he was going but I decided to sprint up and catch up to him, I managed to grab him the shoulder…in response he turned his head at me with surprise.  
  
"Craig?!"  
  
"Tweek…Tw-Tweek…" I had to puff out a few sighs and heaves as I tried to catch my breath, Tweek stared at me with a worried face(and oh how adorable it looked)  
  
"Are you alright?"  
  
"Ye-ah…just…need to…relax."  
  
"Oh well uh…how about we go sit on that bench over there."  
  
Tweek assisted me as we sat on a nearby bench, It felt warm. As the rays of the sun directly shone above it. I looked at Tweek, he still had his worried look on...I was thinking on how I was going to tell him about the whole "I love you and I want to spend the rest of my whole life with you thing..."  
  
"You're sweating…" Tweek suddenly said, interrupting my thoughts.  
  
"I sprinted from my house to here…also the temperature is tropical what do you expect?"  
  
"You look hot…I think you should remove your hat t-thing or whatever it's called."  
  
"Oh yeah…" I actually had my chullo on today; I didn't notice…I have gotten quite used to not wearing it due to the heat.  
  
"But then again you would still l-look hot without it…"  
  
For a second I thought my ears played tricks on me but when I looked at Tweek he had this blushing face/adorable smile combo…Did he just say I look hot? Did my object of desire and root of mixed feelings, depression and confusion just say that I look hot? Oh God I hope I am not dreaming…  
  
"Craig…I"  
  
"Hm?"  
  
"I've been wanting to tell you something for a while…I had been thinking so much about it that I actually had to take leaves from my usual shift…Y-you see -nng- I really really like you...more than a friend I didn't really realize this before until you and your sister kept coming to the shop daily…I would always peek at you from the kitchen hoping that I was always the one in charge of the register when you come, I-I am not -nng- forcing you to like me back or anything because I know that it's not p-possible that you like me too but…I just don't think I can keep my feelings for you anymore…I got really depressed when I first realized it and kept denying myself and also because I know that this is bound to -nng- r-ruin our friendship especially since we've just started to get close again after all those years but fuck i-it I love you Craig. Oh so very m-much… Oh GOD PLEASE DON'T KILL ME OR FLIP ME OFF OR BOTH."  
  
I went silent as I listened to his words…He had just said exactly what I had been experiencing for the past few days…although he was more quick to realize and unlike me he didn't had a little sister to let him realize it, he's amazing. And as gay as this sound I knew that I am complete fucking inlove with him.  
  
I didn't really know how to answer properly…since this is the first time that someone had confessed to me and that someone is someone I really love…I decided to answer him with a kiss in which he shyly kissed back, His lips felt warm and I tasted a hint of coffee…this was pure bliss, when we pull ourselves apart he had on a dazed warm smile that was way too adorable this world, Oh god I wanna fucking hug him…or maybe just fuck him either way is good.  
  
Confessing to him turned out to be much easier than I thought.  
  
  
  
* * *  
  
  
  
 **EPILOGUE**  
  
 _In a private facebook group chat somewhere…_  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** GUESS WHO JUST HOOKED HIS APATHETIC BROTHER UP WITH A TWITCHY SPAZZ…THAT'S RIGHT I DID! I AM FIRST BITCHES!  
  
 **Ike Broflovski:** Oh for fucks sake Ruby, this isn't a race…  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** You're just jealous because you haven't set up your brother with that Stan yet.  
  
 **Ike Broflovski:** I am working on it!  
  
 **Ike Broflovski:** And Stan has a girlfriend how am I supposed to break them up? Ughhh  
  
 **Karen McCormick:** My brother's been hanging out with Butters a lot lately, I think I am doing pretty well too. :)  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** Oooh that's nice good for you Karen! :DDDDD  
  
 **Ike Broflovski:** I hate you two…  
  
 **Karen McCormick:** Don't worry Ike, we'll help you set your brother up.  
  
 **Ike Broflovski:** I know you have good intentions Karen…but I really don't need your pity.  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** Oh come on Ike you know you need it ;)  
  
 **Ike Broflovski:** Fuck you  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** Fuck you too (╹◡╹)凸  
  
 **Ike Broflovski:** Ughh  
  
 **Karen McCormick:** So you're done with CREEK, who are you going to set up next Ruby?  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** Hmm haven't decided yet, want me to help you set up BUNNY?  
  
 **Karen McCormick:** Oh you'll do that for me? thanks Ruby!  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** Of course (^_^)  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** You see that Ike? Karen's not afraid not get help totally unlike you…lower your pride sometimes will you?  
  
 **Ike Broflovski** : (¬_¬)  
  
 **Karen McCormick:** Or if you don't want Ruby helping then you could always ask Shelly for help.  
  
 **Ike Broflovski:** That actually sounds like a good idea…do you think she'll agree? Should I add her to our group?  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** I dunno…but one thing is for sure.  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** The pairing CREEK has sailed it's ship into the land of rainbows and happiness!  
  
 **Ike Broflovski:** Sounds gay  
  
 **Ruby Tucker:** It is. ;)  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! A few ending notes: I named Craig's sister "Ruby" as apparently it's the most popular fan name, And i I am not really sure how much a cup of coffee cost in America...since I am not American so I just made a wild guess it's probably cheaper or more expensive but really idk.


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